You’ve heard of the expression she is a hot mess…well many have called me that…I’m assuming its coz I’m pretty(yes I’m tooting my own horn but what the hell😁😁😁) and that I have the ability to mess up good things that come my way..no worries I’m working on that part.
See the other day I was on a YouTube mission to listen to Joel Osteen coz I was feeling abit mellow and sad😖.I needed some uplifting and some motivation to keep being me and do what I do without feeling less of a person, one of his sermons was about how God doesn’t make mistakes.
See I have a unique story that you will have the opportunity to hear one day. And due to that story I am fearful of love and relationships. Don’t get me wrong I’m not the kind NOT to fall in love,on the other hand I fall really hard sometimes; however I have this walls and when I feel like someone has gotten so close I go into what I call a sabotage mission…to just make whatever we have crumble.I know nasty behaviour right?😳😳
Back to my story..see as he was talking I begun to realise that my past shouldn’t determine my present…just because I made a few mistakes in the past shouldn’t mean I should carry them into the relationship that I have with other people…coz God already knew my whole story even before I was born..he knew that I would go through a,b,c and for that reason I am who I am today.
Will you accept me and love me for all my faults?
I am on a continuous journey of self discovery. I have learnt this year that I hold grudges on myself. For not being like so and so or as bright as who and whom…I hold myself to such great expectations that I carry that into my association with other people .
If I do this, May you please be generous with your mercy and forgiveness and see me through eyes of love. Would you hold me in those moments of self doubt and assure me that despite my stupidity of chasing you away that you Still want me?
I ask for your words of honesty and your kindness at heart to hold my hand even when we are in an argument, to never let the sun rise without the words “I love you” come from your lips. To always hug me like tomorrow is not assured coz for sure it really isn’t.
I ask that your eyes see nothing but beauty even on the days that I have no makeup on. To hear the good even when it’s just venom that leaks through my mouth. To wipe my tears and whisper God’s assured word of promise for a better tomorrow.
May we awake with prayer for a stronger union and two hearts full of love.
I ask not for continuous texts proclaiming love but a call with our secret code.
I ask for patience during our time together as we both work on discovering who we are together and as individuals.
I promise to do the same for you..because once you have my love, it’s yours to keep.
So please don’t let what we have fade out. Don’t let the fire burn out.
Forever and always❤❤❤❤