incoherrent thoughts

Hey guys,I know I know…you’ve been missing me but I am here now 🙂

So much has been happening lately and med school has decided to unleash its pent-up anger on me like an angry menstruating woman but oh well… life isn’t meant to be a smooth road is it? I am meant to be reading for my rotation round and here I am reading other peoples blogs, basically being a weird person right now but its never that serious….hahaha…LIES!!

I really wanted to talk about the 100 days of self discovery journey I am currently doing but I felt a stronger need to ask this question..

who are you?

I know…i know….so many people ask you this question and its so frustrating, but its really such a genuine question that many people just assume the answer and really never sit down to ponder about it. Researchers say that from the moment you popped out of your mamma, the mind starts formulating its own persona(freaky), that’s why some kids are temperamental and others are subdued and follow instructions.

Growing up, your parents were helping you and guiding you through this process of self discovery and when you reach that dreaded teenage age, they really don’t have any clue on what you’re doing or what you deciding ( BUT we all know “the AFRICAN parent” will not dare let you do that but WE “conniving generation of busting hormones and the itching urge to experiment” always find a way to push past their restrictions and let loose) Yes let loose.. arghhhh…how I hate that phrase (together with YOLO…just die already ).

Anyway in this young and tender age we do things we shall ALWAYS remember (like when you kissed a boy or girl(your sexual orientation determines this) for the first time, or when you went for your first rave  -ratchet people probably dont remember such details-   or when you took your mothers car for a joyride without her knowledge< though I’m pretty sure my mother woke up and saw me push that car till the end of our driveway and kept hush about it waiting for the day I make a huge mistake and bring it up>

Then you get into university or college …oh my oh my…. all you think about is the freedom(with your new ID card that your dad helped you apply for), the endless parting every single weekend and the road trips you lie to your parents about(ATI your reading for an exam) hehehe….

Like me you’re maybe still in this primitive age and when asked the question of who you are …you get tongue tied, stammer a bit and act like you probably didn’t hear that question.

IN MY PERSPECTIVE ; You don’t know who you are really because you have let other things come between you and that initial process of self discovery you had as a baby. Honest but true

Yes maybe you did learn something about yourself but it doesn’t really help you answer that question does it?

See I was asked this question and its taken me roughly 2 months to come to an answer that satisfies me for now. When I was asked I really didn’t know how to describe myself; i presumed that my residence, gender, age and schooling gave me a lee way but it didn’t. I realized that I have put society’s petty whims  take the front line in determining who I am.

NO, I do not like sitting with a group of people sharing a “sippy cup” of alcohol cos its cool, NO I do not like dancing like a pole dancer every single night coz the cool kids are doing so,

NO I will not go spend thousands of my mothers money to wear a particular outfit or brand because everyone is doing so…

When you sit down to ask yourself this question you will see how much peer pressure and silly things the society demands being the center of your answer and that’s when it will probably hit you that you wasted (x) years of your life doing things to impress others rather than impressing yourself.

I’m not saying that it was wrong … I mean  that its time to take charge of your thoughts and live your life, be happy, smile, laugh, date and mingle, find and curve your niche in society so that others will remember you as THAT person…

It all starts with you my friends… LIVE LARGE BUT WISELY

until the next one!! ❤