When I was a kid I used to be so jealous of my cousins. They used to get so much and all I wanted to be was like them; So sophisticated and classy in a youthful way: they weren’t like my parents but they weren’t like my brother and sister either. They got to dress in whatever they wanted and dictate on whether they were going to shags or not. Unlike them I had to do everything I was told to do and had to go for two weeks at least each holiday to shags.. I wanted to be grown up.
You know how you get culture shock when you are in another country a few days after you get there? Well…..that applies to me but now lets rephrase. my culture shock was more cos growing up wasn’t all that it looked like when i was young. Growing up meant I have responsibilities and duties that weren’t there when I was younger. Do I really have to make my bed? Must I really pick up dog poo? I mean its not me that made it poop soooo….. but that wasn’t the worst part of growing up.
Growing up has its ups and downs, for me I must say I think it was a balance of both but sometimes the window is so tainted all you see is the negative. Have you ever been in love? And I don’t mean this stupid things y’all feel two days after you meet someone but that thunderbolt under your skin when you meet, that excitement when you hear your phone ring and its him/her? Sweaty palms and feet that draw the map of Kenya when your together? trying to act cool when all you do is just melt like chocolate in a hot car…..
No one warned me about love. Every person talked about sex and its dangers or pleasures, depends on which angle you look at it from. People told me about drinking and the implication of it , BUT no one told me about love. nobody told me you hit the ground hard its hard to breathe, no one told me that sometimes it doesn’t last so you must pick yourself up and dust yourself. Nobody told me that your first love will always remain in your heart however much you try to forget. But if I am honest I must say that I am glad no one did. Because somethings you must learn through your OWN experience rather than listen to stories of others. My mother is cheeky, being a therapist I think she always knows whats happening to her kids but will never let on. So when I did fall in love for the very first time, she came to my room and told me that I may kiss frogs before meeting the prince. Then she left. LOL…. Anyway, that love didn’t last as long as the fairy stories and romance novels may put it. I am glad though that it put what i felt into focus and taught me that nothing is ever easy, nothing is vain, but it will always be beautiful.
Growing up showed me that friends are important. My parents always used to introduce their friends as the ”person i was with in high school/primary/ university”. Never ever have they introduced someone they are just becoming friends with. Growing up showed me there are friends for a season/ a reason and a lifetime. I still cant tell you who falls where with all the “friends” I have now because growing up has shown me that even your closest friends may bitch about you and say things behind your back and hurt you bad but they will remain your friends. You will keep them because if your like me making friends is a bit tricky and goddamn DIFFICULT. Growing up has HOWEVER Shown me that in-differences will bring you closer to them and when the dust settles and bitterness fades from your mouth all will be well, if your friendship is in the works for you it will always work out for you guys.
I am still growing up and I cant wait to see what this journey has in store for me.
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